How is it November?

All of a sudden, without any idea how it happened, this year that has only just started, and started horribly, has almost stumbled to the end, and I’m not sure HOW it’s November and I haven’t quite got used to writing 2015 on things yet. My house smells of lemsip, olbas oil and vanilla candles that are adding an air of cosiness to fight off the glooms, and the kids are spending most evenings colouring things in and asking me to display their ‘artwork’ all over the walls.

We’ve just got past the first half term break of both my kids being in school – and we are all more exhausted now than we were before the holiday, and I think perhaps we needed an actual holiday! Instead we had a couple of days out, cleared out even MORE of the things that surround us in our little house, and napped a lot.

Both boys are doing fantastically in school – this is the best year for Jellybean so far, and he’s learning as much about himself as he is about all his favourite topics. Midget Gem has settled in well and is doing very well, and seems popular, but is tired a lot and can be fairly hard work in the evenings at times!

I am feeling the change of the season, and would rather like to hibernate for a few weeks until everything stops being so gloomy. Clock change always seems to mean that everything gets done in the dark, and that can be draining.

The gloominess does tend to make me feel miserable, and it’s tempting to wallow in it – but that’s not very helpful, so instead I’ve bought new wall lamps, bright lampshades, and lots of crafty activities to spend time with the kids making home feel more cosy and colourful, to make a space that keeps us smiling.

If, however, anyone has some spare tickets to sunnier climes and fancies whisking us away for a while for some genuine vitamin D , feel free to offer!

I was sent the new Def Leppard album last week, and that’s taken me back to being a grungy teenager, and if you like cheesy 90s rock, I strongly suggest you go and buy a copy; there’s nothing like the music from your youth to put a smile on your face! When all my friends at school were into Take That and Boyzone, I was a die hard Def Leppard fan, and it turns out my taste hasn’t got any less cheesy since!

Right now it’s almost time to collect two grouchy boys from school in the fog, and an evening of comfort food, cuddles and Disney is the plan to let all of us have a bit of down time and relaxation – and hopefully none of us (myself included) will have a tantrum!

Time keeps passing

It’s been ages since I posted, again. It doesn’t feel like it’s been ages.

Time is peculiar at the moment. The minutes seem to take an eternity to drag by, but months fly past without me noticing, and I’m not sure how!

It feels like a huge amount has been happening, and at the same time I can’t think of a single thing to say.

I’m still working hard on my business, and on completing a series of diplomas that compliment the ‘learning on the job’ experience of ten years in the industry, and am surprised to find that I really do know an awful lot about the business, and to remind myself how very passionate I am about what I do.

I’m also working hard on making my home more homely. This includes a seemingly endless process of clearing things out of it – and no matter how many trips I make to the dump or charity shops, there still seems to be another mountain of ‘stuff’ behind me when I turn around!

I’ve eBayed loads of things this week, but because my eBay account is quite new (I opened a new one after splitting from my ex, because I used to just use his) and I’ve sold a lot in just a few days, PayPal are now holding the funds for 21 days to ensure I’m not dodgy – which means I’m paying out of my own pocket to post dozens of parcels around the UK and it’s costing me a fortune! Most frustrating.

I’ve also been spending a lot of time and energy helping my boys settle into their new term – the youngest is in reception and is exhausted by being in school full time so is even more stroppy than he usually is, and he’s a stroppy so and so! The eldest seems to be much happier this term, and we are finally making real progress in getting him a diagnosis that will help him to get more support at school. His teacher and the Senco at the school are in agreement with my suggestion that he has aspergers – and he is now in lunchtime clubs that are specifically for children with spectrum disorders that help him to engage more with his work and with the other children – and he is so happy compared to last term, when his former teacher seemed to just think he was a challenging child. His happiness this year shines from him, and it’s so nice to know he’s finding this term easier.

It’s lovely seeing my little one run into his class happily each morning, too – he’s a popular boy and his teachers seem to be charmed by him – he’s a bright little button, and is taking to the reading and writing like a duck to water. By friday evening he’s shattered, and a grumpy bear, but it’s getting better as he gets used to it. I forgot the grumps and exhaustion from Jellybean starting school but from the chats in the playground I think the whole of reception are the same, it’s just one of the things you wipe from your mind!

I don’t really have much else to say. I’m just plodding along, surviving each day, and hoping I’ll be less exhausted soon. I’ve joined the gym in the hope that getting fitter will help – so far it’s made me sweat a lot, cost me a bomb, and given me sore ankles! I’ll give a progress report on that when I’ve been going for a few weeks and we’ll see if I’ve got the benefits I want out of it.

I had a long think…

I opened this blog last year, knowing that I was in a period of change and that the other blog I ran didn’t feel like ‘home’ and that it wasn’t the place I wanted to write any more.

I opened this blog thinking I would have a new place, where I’d be able to be myself and write about my life again in a way I’d lost, trying to make my other blog show life in a way it didn’t really exist.

Things changed A LOT since I started this blog – and blogging at all felt like something I couldn’t do, and didn’t want to do, and wasn’t part of my world any more.

But I miss writing about things that aren’t work related, I miss writing for myself and not just for clients, I miss blogging.

So I had a long think about what I wanted to write about, where I wanted to write it, and remembered this blog – so I thought I’d come back. This was intended to be the place where I got to be myself – and since I wrote that first post forever ago, I have actually BECOME myself.

Possibly for the first time in my life!

I’m not lost now, or trying to appear ok, I’m genuinely ok – and there’s a lot going on with me and the boys that I’d like to go back to sharing with my family and friends. So I’m going back to the original reason I started blogging way back forever ago; to write about my life, the things I love, the fun I have with my kids, and to share it with the people who know and love us.

I’m not anticipating a big following on this blog – but I am happy to have written something!

*settles into the new home with a coffee and a blanket*

Here we go!

Can’t we all land a spacecraft on a comet?

Today is the day of the Rosetta landing. Rosetta is the spacecraft, and it is carrying the Philae lander which is being released and landed on a moving comet, millions of miles from Earth. The Philae lander is a robot with all kinds of fabulous scientific equipment, which will investigate the surface and contents of a comet – and the make up of our solar system.

For accurate details of the mission and what’s being done, and why, look at the ESA website – my grasp of the science isn’t enough to explain it, but it’s fascinating.

Launching things into space still amazes me. It’s been happening since before I was born, but when you really think about it the idea of sending things into space – the huge, endless, vastness of space, the very tiniest window of which we can see and comprehend – and being able to track, communicate with, gather knowledge from those things – and bring them back safely, to do it with people inside, it’s just incredible.

I adore space, staring up at the stars, thinking about what could possibly be out there, what it all means for us here, and why we’re so separate to the rest, so alive compared to other things in our own solar system, with consciousness and thought – it just all gets mind boggling. It’s so BIG. Space itself, the ideas that come when you start thinking about it, the vast nothingness that we understand so little about – the feeling of being so small in it all.

And today, out there in that huge, huge nothing full of things, a robot lander will harpoon itself to a moving comet and will begin gathering information that will help us to understand billions of years of history and development, help us to understand the creation of the Earth, to understand how and why we began.

This is huge. This is incredible.

The fact that the technology has been developed that can send a spacecraft into orbit, have it track and follow a comet, have it launch what is essentially a small lab (the science kind, not the dog kind) that can then attach to a hostile, moving environment – something so small in SO MUCH SPACE – is a wonderful thing, and it thrills me.

It’s also made me think more about all the things that feel big that aren’t. The things we all think matter, the things we all upset ourselves about, the things we dwell on and build into dramas, the unhappinesses we wallow in, the happinesses we let slide by, or don’t really indulge, because we’re so busy worrying about the moment it will end…today history is being made. And I’ve spent half of the day worrying about things that only I can change, and doing nothing to change them. What a waste.

If there was a beach 100 miles long and somehow you could throw one grain of sand to accurately land on a specific grain of sand at the very far end, that would be amazing. And we’re doing that, in space, millions of miles away – two tiny, tiny things from millions of miles apart, coming together, because science and passion have made it happen. It’s amazing.

Why, when we can do that, when people together can do that, do we waste so much time on petty things, worrying about something that we can’t change, or not changing things we can, because we think it matters so much. Why do we give so much energy to people or situations that aren’t our comet in space? Why aren’t we all trying to land a robot on a space rock?

Aren’t we all capable of changing things, of making history, of following our own happiness?

A tenuous link to a space mission, perhaps, but the enormity of space always focusses my mind on the insignificance of the things I worry about – and it helps me to be able to make my own changes. Something we should all remember that we’re capable of doing.

All aboard

A lot of people reading this first post will already know me – but in other places.

Some will know me as the twitter addict @Eliza_Do_Lots – that’s where I plan to remain, because it’s who I am – and I do a lot – and it’s where I’ve found a lot of friends, and launched my copywriting career properly.

Some will know that copywriting business on twitter as @ElizaDoLots (see what I did there?) where I just tweet about work related things.

Some of you will know the other blogs I write – most of you Mommatwo, where I blog about the kids, the things we do, how much gin I require to get through the normal day to day. (It’s quite a lot, if you aren’t sure.)

Some will know Eliza Do Lots – my main business site, showcasing my work and the kind of areas I currently work in, with a blog about blogging, networking and copywriting.

I’ve been around online forever and a day – I remember being around 12 and starting my first blog, painfully embarrassing and full of long, wordy posts on long-lost livejournal about my angsty pre-teen dramas.

I’ve always been fascinated with the way the internet was growing and bringing the world together, sharing information, building relationships, and the dark side of all of that.

I studied a degree that brought my two great loves – that contemporary culture, everything that makes us all tick, the why, the how, the development – and writing, both creatively and to suit a brief.

I’ve worked in the media, in local government, in retail management and for myself – the last most of all. I’ve tied all these experiences together in order to find a path doing something I am passionate about – and blogging is a huge part of that.

The other blogs I write are about specific areas of who I am, and of what I do. But that leaves out huge swathes of my life, and of me, that I want to be able to talk about to other people who care about those things.

Also, I really like talking about myself. And taking selfies. But who doesn’t!

So this is another new home. This is a place I can share ideas, passions, dreams and things I’ve been doing – and it’s also a way to inspire me to just get out and actually DO more of those things. Not put it off for the sake of a lie in, or because I can’t be bothered to wash my hair.

All aboard – this ship is setting sail into the big, blue yonder.

Don’t forget the coffee maker…I’ll take mine black.